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Post by Akago on May 28, 2008 16:06:55 GMT -5
Kay, I was trying my hardest not to make a forum like this, but the journal I normally keep isn't helping, and frankly, I feel like screaming. Why do I feel like screaming? Well, I'll explain.
(Forgive if this next bit warrants the ban hammer anywhere else, but I really need to piss and moan some. I can also promise lots of naughty language.)
As you know, I am 18. I am an 18 year old eager to get a job, and frankly, get the f**k out of this hell hole I call a home. My parents have both been sick for years, with a longer list of illnesses then some spoiled rich s**t's list to Santa. My brother is a 22 year old lazy f**ktard bum who doesn't have a job. My parents refuse to throw him out too. He trashes everything he touches, he doesn't do any house work. I have a few small medical problems of my own (Back and shoulder problems, headaches, possible mental problems, insomnia.).
Where does this leave me? Well, a single statement from my father will be enough to explain it. I had forgotten my mother had asked me for something, and my father was talking to me about it. 'We depend on you to much for you to do stuff like that.' How can I ever leave without feeling guilty with them saying stuff like that? I mean, I'm a f**kING KID! I'm no f**king adult yet. I know its selfish, but I want my own f**king life. I don't want to spend a good chunk of the first part of it looking after them. I just don't know what the hell to do.
I know people have it worse then me, but I really just needed to vent. I know I'm being selfish. I just feel like the stress is starting to mush me into pieces, and this is the only place I could think of letting it out.
Sorry. I figure at least this topic can at least be used by anyone else who needs to ventilate the s**tastic thing we call the real world.
Sorry again. *runs off and hides under her bed while she waits for people to warm the ban cannon*
PS: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Yeah, I feel a little better now..
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Post by TDF on May 28, 2008 16:30:13 GMT -5
*Now we need a Rant-Room Wow, that's harsh >=X Reminds me alot of myself , in a way (But wayy, not as bad) a) I used to have insomnia (Just staying in bed, lying down....Trying to shut my damned eyes) b) I ALREADY am starting to have shoulder/back aches (And that's not good, saying i'm twelve) c) Thinking of having a baby sister at the beginning was fun, but whene my mom finally gave birth *cough* again, I now have a 1-year old sister with the destructive force ten times Shadow's, I have my hands full. d) I have the worst luck ever e) My dad travels alot, leaving my Mom with a 12-year old, 8-year old, and a 1 year old. f) I may have ADD, Everone at my school thinks so, my Mom doesn't think, my dad can't decide, my bestest (Exuse the grammer) friend deeply despises the IDEA, he says I defenately don't have it. -- And actually, your a young adult =X I'm really the only person here who can be properly classified as a "kid" But, whatever.... Well....Ummm....*runs because he spoke his deepest problems*
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Post by Akago on May 28, 2008 17:07:34 GMT -5
True I guess. I guess its just I won't feel like an adult until I can go live as an adult though. My back problems started when I was 11, when I started to have to luge heavy books around in middle school and it made it really really sore. After a few years, it just kept getting worse to where I couldn't get out of bed. Then we find out I have extra ribs in my neck which were pinching the nerves and the heavy books were making it do that worse. Hence one of the reasons I wound up as homeschooled.
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Post by Quacker Duk on May 29, 2008 20:29:26 GMT -5
Glad you feel better, Akago. Feel free to rant here. That's what friends, internet and otherwise, are for.
Sorry about the back problems. That's rough. People used to warn me about heavy books and what not when I was young, and I never believed them. You're living proof that we need to be more careful!!
The other problems are a bit more complicated. Parents can be tough. You want to love and respect them, but at your age, it becomes clear they they are fallible, and sometimes don't know best. It's a pretty startling realization. That still doesn't keep them from using guilt against you, which is their most powerful weapon...
As far as your brother goes, that's sucks. When you are as motivated as you are, it is tough to put up with folks in your way who aren't as driven.
The insomnia can be a pain in the ass. It's no longer a problem for me, but there was a time period in College was I was addicted to NyQuil, as the only way to get to sleep.
PS: TD fan is right. At 18, you're not really a kid anymore. You can legally obtain a gun, vote and drive a car -- albeit not all at the same time.
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Post by Akago on May 30, 2008 2:32:07 GMT -5
Shadow was able to do two of those three things at the same time though. *brick'd*
Yes, books hurt. The lesson isn't not to carry heavy stuff, its to stop when it starts hurting. And go to the doctors if it doesn't stop, instead of telling yourself its normal and trying to ignore it at first like a yuts.
I know I'm not really a kid. I'm just having trouble wrapping my head around it. Things have always been like this, so its hard to realize that anything has changed. Really, I've always known my parents are fallible. Dad has been sick since I was really little, and mom started getting sick when I was 12. Then 4 years later, a week before my 16th birthday (One can understand why I complain so much about those whiny brats on that MTV 'sweet 16' show(, she went into a two mouth coma. When she came out of it, she had a lot of severe problems, and lotsa medical bills. The hospital screwed up and we didn't have to pay for any of it though. Yay for good krama I guess.
As far as motivation, I'm not as much as I should be. The house is a total mess, and I spend most of my time buring my head in drawing, computers, or anything really I can to avoid the real world. Probably not a good habit to have, and one I'll break once I finally get out on my own.
And I still can't drive, no licence. My parents said they were going to take me up to get it the day of my birthday, but that never happened. I'm still bothering them about it. And I'd rather eat rat poison then ask my brother... cause I think getting in a car with him might have the same result.
I care about my brother, and my parents, but sometimes, I really just wish I could pick up a hammer and go Amy on all of them.
Edit: Crap, I typed all that? x.x Guess I got going on a ramble and didn't stop.
Edit2: Yeah, I am starting to feel better. Its nice to be able to complain about stuff all I want without getting the 'Your just being selfish and whiny' or the 'Others got it worse' lines.
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MasterEvilPrower
Junior Member
i'am evil...so...DON'T MESS WITH ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posts: 59
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Post by MasterEvilPrower on Jun 4, 2008 18:31:40 GMT -5
im really srry,but i am DESPREATE to whine! heheh....hah! i don't need to whine! im just here to suck the souls outta ya!....ok,heres 1 whine.....i couldn't go swimmin' at a ''friends'' house,because I was hvng dinner from tacobell in 1 HR.! 1 HR.,ppl!but i'am also here to suck the souls outta ya!
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Post by Master Silver on Jun 4, 2008 18:52:40 GMT -5
Well, that won't work on me, since I don't have a soul.
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MasterEvilPrower
Junior Member
i'am evil...so...DON'T MESS WITH ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posts: 59
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Post by MasterEvilPrower on Jun 4, 2008 20:13:52 GMT -5
oh,really king silver? oh yh,silver is hot,so YOU,king silver MUST be hot! im not really here to suck the souls outta ya.....im just kidding,im not gonna suck the souls outta ya ppls!
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Post by Quacker Duk on Jun 6, 2008 2:35:01 GMT -5
I care about my brother, and my parents, but sometimes, I really just wish I could pick up a hammer and go Amy on all of them. And that it the definition of family, albeit a rather geeky one. Well said Akago. It is worth getting your driver's license, though. If you think getting your own room is liberating, imagine being able to drive wherever you want!
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Post by Master Silver on Jun 6, 2008 7:03:37 GMT -5
oh,really king silver? oh yh,silver is hot,so YOU,king silver MUST be hot! You are starting to make me feel really uncomfortable. The fact that you think I'm hot yet you have NO CLUE AS TO WHO THE HELL I AM worries me. Anyways, Akago, that really sucks. And just because this is in the spam area.. KILLER CHICKENS.
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Post by Quacker Duk on Jun 6, 2008 10:44:57 GMT -5
Good point, Masta Silvah.
Evilpower -- please don't harass King Silver. We don't tollerate sexual harrasment in this club, unless it's directed at Rouge the Bat.
Or Princess Peach.
Come to think about it, Princess Elise kind of has it coming to: Sick, Animal-Frenching freak. With a pervert like her running Soliana, I'd hate to think of the general moral fiber of the nation. She's like Catherine the Great, with a thing for prickle backs.
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Post by Master Silver on Jun 6, 2008 11:09:42 GMT -5
I just noticed that "harassment" has the word "ass" in it *SHOT!*
And Elise running Soleana? Yikes, no!
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Post by Kingpin on Jun 6, 2008 17:15:18 GMT -5
well I guess I need to say some crap lets see here 1) My real dad was a f**kjob and stole my moms money 2) my brother's a b***h and gets him and his friends to topple me over whenever I leave the safty of my home 3) I am considered a nerd because I refused to moon some chick 4) I dont sleep 9 out of ten nights 5)I got toppled by a guy at my school known to me as godzilla 6)I cant sit up straight because of an incedent in grade 2 7) my mom is P.Oed at me because I told them that my lil bro stole all the drinks in the house for his friends 8) the bullying on me is so bad I have to see the school counsler nearly everyday.
well other than that im great so ive done my ranting it feels nice to get this s**t off my chest.
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Post by Master Silver on Jun 6, 2008 18:19:47 GMT -5
Well, it's my turn to rant now.
F*** STUDENT SERVICES!
They just can't leave me alone, can they?! They've called me down 8 or so times the past month (May, not June) and it's pissing me off.
Every...single...EFFING...time... it's just for them to say "zomg ur liek failing math rofl". I already know that, so why the f**k do you keep pulling me out of my classes to tell me some random bullnuts I already know?! In my opinion, they're trying to "motivate" me somehow, and if they actually are, they're doing a horrible f**king job.
Now, I already know I'll have to go to summer school. Yet they INSIST on calling me down to tell me I'm failing math. If I have to go ONE MORE FRICKING TIME I will scream so loud JAPAN will hear it.
There... I'm done...
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MasterEvilPrower
Junior Member
i'am evil...so...DON'T MESS WITH ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posts: 59
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Post by MasterEvilPrower on Jun 11, 2008 20:42:19 GMT -5
srry.....rouge is kinda cute,execpt she has big boobs. NO OFFONSE,ROUGE!!!!!
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